[Day 5] Still eating to live

Finally, it's been 5 days since I've started this vegan lifestyle. It really isn't that easy. In the first week, I've already broken the "rules". My brother's birthday was yesterday but we had to celebrate it on Tuesday so we ate out at Cheesecake Factory. There really wasn't any vegan meal (if there was, I just didn't see it, lol). The stuff I ordered had cheese on it...>sigh<. Then for small group on Wednesday, my dad made this "vegan" mango bread because he replaced oil with applesauce (or apple juice, not sure). I thought it was vegan, until my mom told me this morning that he used eggs. As soon as she told me that, I felt sick to my stomach...which surprised me because I didn't think I'd react that way.
I can't really say that I feel so much better since starting this diet. My joints still hurt as ever, specifically my left ankle. My mom keeps reassuring me that it will get worse until it gets better...which sucks because I feel like I want to give up right now!!! But this voice in my head keeps saying, "You want to get better, though, right? Do you want to be dependant on medications?." So, that is my motivating factor. Maybe in 3 more weeks my attitude will change. I'm just going to keep praying for God to give me strength!!

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