Love the Unlovable
It's hard to love the unlovable, but it's possible.
With tomorrow being Valentine's Day (that infamous holiday that some people tend to despise, lol) you can't help but face the concept of love from every direction. Obviously there is that romantic love between 2 people, but I believe that we must very well consider our love for God & others. In fact, it's commanded: Jesus replied, "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" [Matthew 22: 37-39]
Love the Lord your God... I don't have a hard time understanding that concept because God IS love. For most of us who recognize this, we can't help but reciprocate that love to our Awesome Creator. He is unchangeable, He knows all things, He sees all things; He's all powerful, loving, merciful, and just. There are (and will continue to be) times when I fail Him, but He is always ready to extend grace and forgiveness...unconditionally. There will also be times when I simply struggle to love and trust Him during tough times, but He will always prove Himself to be faithful and true...sovereign over all things. Throughout the Bible, you see God's relentless pursuit of humanity from cover to cover--a boundless love that cannot be contained or defined in our finite world. So yea, I think it's a lot easier to love someone when you know they've loved you from the very beginning.
Love your neighbor as yourself... I would say I struggle in this area more often than not. We have no control over the way a person behaves or presents themselves. Personality clashes, arguments ensue...not to mention the relationships that are negatively affected by them. It would almost seem like living in solitude is the best solution, but it's not. God had never intended for anyone to live alone. We thrive when we live in community with other people. I would also say that living around others provide us with opportunities to develop godly characteristics such as: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control [Galatians 5:22-23].
With that being said, I want to share something with you that God has graciously revealed to me in a little over 7 hours ago.
Today's Epic lesson (from the Gospel-centered life study) was focusing on the law, the gospel and how they integrate with one another--the law drives us to the gospel, and the gospel frees us to obey the law. I like how Tim Keller's Gospel Grid simplifies the explanation in this way:
We [Epic small group] used another verse to put the Gospel Grid to practice. We used James 2:1-7 which talks about favoritism. This hit me like a ton of bricks because I was actually struggling with expressing impartiality to one particular person on campus. I want to say that his appearance had nothing to do with the way I act, but it does play a part. To put it in perspective, I had just attended a "date auction for charity" event which he happened to be participating. I came late with a few people so I didn't see what happened when he was up for auction, but I was told that he was the only person who got bid on the least at $10. At an event like this, appearance is everything.
I actually befriended him last year. It probably started when I attended his 30th birthday party with another guy friend. I felt bad, I'll admit, because it turned out that my guy friend and I were probably the only ones from school who attended his bowling party (aside from his own family). Then I found him to be a little too creepy whenever we were at the same club events because he would linger around me a little too much. He would also try to make conversations with me, which was hard for me to follow at times because he uses words and concepts that are too complex for me to understand. There were also some stalker tendencies which did creep me out a lot more (Facebook was no help in that arena). I ended up blocking him on Facebook (not to be mean, but because I realized I wasn't comfortable posting anything). I still could not avoid bumping into him randomly on campus. There must have been some spiritual warfare going on because I couldn't bring myself to love him like Jesus. I was trying to avoid him as much as possible because I felt like my actions were being misinterpreted. Maybe the whole situation would have been different if I were a guy...but since no guy who would take the initiative to be friends with him, I guess I took it upon myself to take on the responsibility.
Anyways, I can't change what has already happened in the past. I can only move forward. Whenever I ask God what needs to change in my character, He keeps bringing to mind this particularly "unlovable" person. I knew God wanted me to love him like Jesus, but I couldn't really see what that would look like. After reading James 2:1-7, the conviction I experienced from the Holy Spirit pierced my heart with excruciating precision. A heavy weight of guilt and shame flooded my consciousness. I realized what a jerk I've been. Loving like Jesus doesn't mean I have to trust the person and I don't think it involves ignoring them either. This awareness of my sin brought me to my knees before God. Through God's power, my attitude of partiality towards this guy turned to compassion. Through the Spirit, I was able to see him as a person who Christ died for because He deeply loved him. So...the Gospel Grid of explaining James 2:1-7, for me, looked a little something like this:
With tomorrow being Valentine's Day (that infamous holiday that some people tend to despise, lol) you can't help but face the concept of love from every direction. Obviously there is that romantic love between 2 people, but I believe that we must very well consider our love for God & others. In fact, it's commanded: Jesus replied, "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" [Matthew 22: 37-39]
Love the Lord your God... I don't have a hard time understanding that concept because God IS love. For most of us who recognize this, we can't help but reciprocate that love to our Awesome Creator. He is unchangeable, He knows all things, He sees all things; He's all powerful, loving, merciful, and just. There are (and will continue to be) times when I fail Him, but He is always ready to extend grace and forgiveness...unconditionally. There will also be times when I simply struggle to love and trust Him during tough times, but He will always prove Himself to be faithful and true...sovereign over all things. Throughout the Bible, you see God's relentless pursuit of humanity from cover to cover--a boundless love that cannot be contained or defined in our finite world. So yea, I think it's a lot easier to love someone when you know they've loved you from the very beginning.
Love your neighbor as yourself... I would say I struggle in this area more often than not. We have no control over the way a person behaves or presents themselves. Personality clashes, arguments ensue...not to mention the relationships that are negatively affected by them. It would almost seem like living in solitude is the best solution, but it's not. God had never intended for anyone to live alone. We thrive when we live in community with other people. I would also say that living around others provide us with opportunities to develop godly characteristics such as: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control [Galatians 5:22-23].
With that being said, I want to share something with you that God has graciously revealed to me in a little over 7 hours ago.
Today's Epic lesson (from the Gospel-centered life study) was focusing on the law, the gospel and how they integrate with one another--the law drives us to the gospel, and the gospel frees us to obey the law. I like how Tim Keller's Gospel Grid simplifies the explanation in this way:
1. God says, "Do not lie"
2. I cannot obey this command because I am a sinner.
3. Jesus did obey this perfectly. [...] Jesus did what I should do (but can't) as my substitute so that God can accept me.
4. Because Jesus obeyed the law perfectly and now lives in me, and because I am accepted by God, I am now free to obey this command by his grace and power at work in me.This grid example helped me to see things a lot more clearer when it comes to living with moral excellence; not in a way to gain God's favor through performance, but with the deep desire to live and love like Jesus.
We [Epic small group] used another verse to put the Gospel Grid to practice. We used James 2:1-7 which talks about favoritism. This hit me like a ton of bricks because I was actually struggling with expressing impartiality to one particular person on campus. I want to say that his appearance had nothing to do with the way I act, but it does play a part. To put it in perspective, I had just attended a "date auction for charity" event which he happened to be participating. I came late with a few people so I didn't see what happened when he was up for auction, but I was told that he was the only person who got bid on the least at $10. At an event like this, appearance is everything.
I actually befriended him last year. It probably started when I attended his 30th birthday party with another guy friend. I felt bad, I'll admit, because it turned out that my guy friend and I were probably the only ones from school who attended his bowling party (aside from his own family). Then I found him to be a little too creepy whenever we were at the same club events because he would linger around me a little too much. He would also try to make conversations with me, which was hard for me to follow at times because he uses words and concepts that are too complex for me to understand. There were also some stalker tendencies which did creep me out a lot more (Facebook was no help in that arena). I ended up blocking him on Facebook (not to be mean, but because I realized I wasn't comfortable posting anything). I still could not avoid bumping into him randomly on campus. There must have been some spiritual warfare going on because I couldn't bring myself to love him like Jesus. I was trying to avoid him as much as possible because I felt like my actions were being misinterpreted. Maybe the whole situation would have been different if I were a guy...but since no guy who would take the initiative to be friends with him, I guess I took it upon myself to take on the responsibility.
Anyways, I can't change what has already happened in the past. I can only move forward. Whenever I ask God what needs to change in my character, He keeps bringing to mind this particularly "unlovable" person. I knew God wanted me to love him like Jesus, but I couldn't really see what that would look like. After reading James 2:1-7, the conviction I experienced from the Holy Spirit pierced my heart with excruciating precision. A heavy weight of guilt and shame flooded my consciousness. I realized what a jerk I've been. Loving like Jesus doesn't mean I have to trust the person and I don't think it involves ignoring them either. This awareness of my sin brought me to my knees before God. Through God's power, my attitude of partiality towards this guy turned to compassion. Through the Spirit, I was able to see him as a person who Christ died for because He deeply loved him. So...the Gospel Grid of explaining James 2:1-7, for me, looked a little something like this:
1. God says, "Do not show partiality"
2. I cannot obey this command because I'm self-centered with the tendency to show partiality
3. Jesus loved perfectly. He hung out will all kinds of people, especially the ones considered most unlovable (i.e. prostitutes, tax collectors, lepers, idolators, thieves, murderers...and the list goes on)
4. Because Jesus obeyed the law perfectly and now lives in me, and because I'm accepted by God, I am now free to obey this command by His grace and power at work in me.It's hard to love the unlovable, especially if left to our own "power" (which actually has no power in and of itself). But it IS possible to love all kinds of unlovable people because God's love gives us the ability to do so.
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